Poetry Part 6

only another 5 or 6 to go :D so hold on tight readers

"F@#$%^"

it feels like lifes over already
left with scars
there to remind me
of all the failures that have occured
the emptyness is my best friend
a million miles away i see a hopeful dream
pity itd never happen in a million years
not even if i had some remnant of luck
life is out there to get me and people say life is wat you make of it
but what can i make of the blackness
its all that is left
i struggle to breathe let alone seek a stray light
what the fuck is wrong with me?
i need some guidance yet all is lost
ruined what i never had
the void never to be consumed by my emotions
all thats left is the bitter resentment of the tragedy
wanna lash out, i wanna strike feel the power
the blood the pain, its worth the release isnt it?
suffering in silence is better than around those who care
it requires less pain they feel
and less useless worrying
fuck this tired life? i dont think it gets better
why the fuck do i do this?
i cant save myself
gotta try n pick myself up but its like my arms weigh the world
i lay here paralysed and motionless people pass by without a care
so contempt in their own little world
i wollow in the depression and the violent catastrophe of emotions in my head
my heads one huge fucked up mess i cant make the slightest piece of
unable to look, unable to love, unable to notice me, she walks away
sometimes shes on my mind, i cant seem to hate her and when im not sure
of my feelings anymore i just seem to fall in love with her again a never ending
cycle of pain and depression, shes so much better off i get how it is
im a fucked up mess and im alone
i need an embrace yet no one is there with open arms
i soul trapt and wounded
bleeding chained to a hope thats drifting
i cant seem to say goodbye
lost and confused

"Kisses Contract"

a mutual contract
signed by the entwined flesh
of two blushing pilgrims
the contract of love
not one to be taken lightly,
the consummation of the desire
and the heat of the sharing warmth
speak of a bond that is the swapping
of two hearts
a piece is taken not to be given back
the silent prayer of a blessing connection
not a betrayed and abused heart
the compassionate gift of thy willing lips
gives consent to be thou's
the vow hoping to be recieved in the movement
of thou other parties lips.
the fire that burns within thy soul
raging higher and higher with each kiss
the piercing eyes willing to see through the bad
to the light and the good which wins the heart over.
the contract of the kiss.
forever a mutual and silent ritual of the heart.

"Last Wishes"

Last wishes
the final thoughts
before the darkness wins
it makes you wonder
who will really care
and who the pretenders were

Last wishes
regrets running through the mind
the steady stream of tears
the grievances' only condolence
desperate plea to go back in time
and change all the wrongs

Last wishes
a final hope
for things to be all
just one horrible dream
a twisted conjuration of the mind
playing on fears

Last wishes
wanting to hold
the hand of thy hearts protector
to feel the warm tenderness
of pure love

Last wishes
vision blurring
the darkness growing
faces slip away
pain fades
a cold numbness
the fearless nothing
purges the deepest recesses
casting into the dismal eternity
that is a means to an end.