Poetry Part 7

Hold tight Readers, your patience is much appreciated. :) Thank you all

"Lost in the Darkness"

what happened?
we were great friends
at least you were one of my best
my feelings grew i couldnt control them
i told you and you were fine
but something changed along the line
and i ran out of time
you went cold and im starting to thin
i fucked up again
its always like this
i ask wats wrong and you always hide behind those 2 words
"im sorry"
at the start i believed you
but now im not so sure
your hiding and i want to know wat i did
so maybe i can fix it
i want things to be the way they used to be
i love you
yet im dying inside
its like im a nuisance to you that you cant get rid of
youve gone cold
im not even sure you care for me
once i thought you did
i cared for you and i was there and i still care
even tho shits hard im not going to abandon you
ill always love you even tho its like you hate me
i need answers as to what i did
its killing me
im lost in the darkness and i have no light
no one can reach me im forever alone
yet i need you
your the only one that can save me
please im begging you just tell me the truth?
what did i do?

"Pain"

before my eyes i see a haze
i realise its the tears that are welling up
my mind freezes
the thing i fear most seems to have happened
shes slipped through my fingers
lost never to be found again
i find my heart slowly ripping into little pieces
this time it cant be fixed
lost in my own misery
the darkness enveloping, surrounding me
i feel a helpless desire
a desperate bid for happiness, a sign all is not lost
im lost without a way to be free
is there any hope left for me?
or is it already too late?

"Poetic Justice"

i thought things were the same.
in truth everything had changed.
for the worst or the better i guess no one will know.
all i no is when im around her the world is right
when im around her time seems to stop
everything is right
however it makes leaving harder on my soul
to see the anguish in our eyes as they depart
i know on the inside that this is all a dream
for why would a girl so beautiful and perfect limit herself
for the dull old boring shell in which my tortured soul binds itself to?
the lies i despise so hatefully are becoming my best friend
the worst i get the more i hide behind them
does that make me evil?
does that turn me into a hypocrite?
am i just a lost cause?
should i even bother with this anymore?
what i thought i could handle i could not.
it brings me down and tears me apart.
its everything slipping away
Do i fight for what can never be mine or do i give up on her to?
dreams are fine but shes everything i dreamed about
im losing control and i dont know the right way to go
i need guidance, i need reasurrance
i need to fight my own fears and accept the truth
my lifes one big pile of shit and im lost
i dont know if i can survive for much longer
im tired of the ache
im sick to fucking death of all my hopes and dreams slipping through my fingers
i guess thats what hopes are for being crushed and ripped to shreds
i may be taking a pessismistic view of this but the words are the ones from my soul.
this is the lament from my heart and soul
my final good bye to the dreams and hopes i once held dear
for now they are no longer within my control